Struggle no longer serves me. It’s a lifelong pattern that I have developed, continually returning to that old, well-worn, unfortunately, comfortable place. There is an odd solace there, or at least a familiarity that bathes me in a sense of knowing where I am. Struggle can ultimately lead to enlightenment, but most often, holds us captive prisoners in a repeated cycle of digging our way out, only then to fall back again to that place we know oh so well.
I am ready to try saying goodbye to that worn-out, tired old companion. I wish I could say that it has served me well, but it hasn’t. If every time I ate a strawberry, I broke out in hives, I would cease eating strawberries. I wouldn’t subject myself to such a threatening state. I’ve endured struggle’s time with me, like an adolescent afraid to end an unhealthy friendship for fear of being alone.
Struggle, masks itself as a comfortable old friend; someone trying to help us figure out the questions of life. Instead, we are trapped in its cycle; an unending loop of digging our way out for a short while, and then returning once again to what we perceive is the path to solving life’s problems. Make no mistake. There is no creativity in struggle. It is not the path to enlightenment, but a foe who will keep you locked in an unending swirling, designed to never let you free.
So today; I am trying on my day without struggle. I won’t be so bold as to say that it is a forever thing, but just for today, I’m throwing caution to the wind and walking out the door without my oldest and most familiar shadow. She is staying home today and will have to try to figure out what to do without me,. I’m joyfully stepping out into the world unencumbered by that faithless accomplice. I feel lighter already, open to filling that space with some kind of daring, audacious possibility,